Don't say, "You're not a Spring chicken anymore" to a pregnant woman (Or any woman)

The other day, I was sitting in an office space and overheard a gentleman talking about his pregnant daughter. You could tell he was excited but had to end the conversation by saying, "Well you know, she is 39 and isn't a spring chicken anymore." I immediately cringed inside. I was 35 when I got pregnant for the first time. This comment would be said to me so often. "Well, no wonder you are feeling X, Y, or Z. You aren't a spring chicken." In my chart I was "Advanced Maternal Age" and the "it's about time" comments were all too common.

First of all, pregnancy is HARD. It doesn't matter what your age is. Our bodies are literally creating life. We are making eyes, ears, nose, mouth, and every other body part within our own body. Can we just take a second and recognize how amazing that is? It is amazing and hard, and we don't need you referencing her experience to a chicken that is in its prime of laying eggs. Gross. Secondly, Women in general are doing the best they can. Pregnant women are doing the best they can. She knows how old she is. She has enough to worry about.

We need to be kinder with the words and phrases we use. You may read this and think, "What's the big deal?" and to this woman, it may be a REALLY big deal. She may be having complications or something scary going on. You never know the whole story. Tell her she is doing an amazing job and ask if there is anything you can do to help! That is way more beneficial and useful for this expectant mother.

*Please just don't say this to any woman period, pregnant or not. Its icky.

If I can ask for one thing is to please Be Kind. Be mindful. Be respectful

XO,

Dr. Ariel Blackburn